Why I Put the Kabosh on Christmas
I think I know what you’re thinking: What a scrooge. I used to be a merry Christmaser, but I have 8 good reasons for not celebrating Christmas.
1. I don’t follow the herd. Everybody’s doing it. Even Chinese Buddhists jump onboard the Eggnog Express. This is not to say I don’t follow the herd on other things. I’m majorly into driving a car, Facebooking, deodorant, and many other très popular modern inventions. Christmas is not one of them. After all, it is my choice.
2. I don’t like being told what to do. Why must it be dictated I give presents to everyone I know one day a year? That’s as silly as saying I must wear antlers only once a year. Maybe I want to wear them every Thursday. Instead, I like to give gifts when my budget and the occasion suits me. Who doesn’t enjoy a spontaneous and unexpected present from someone who really loves them?
3. There’s nothing Christian about Christmas. Well-known fact: it’s a pagan holiday. Why not just call it what it is? It’s the Roman celebration of Saturnalia with the addition of a porcelain baby Jesus. Even the worship of the evergreen tree pre-dates Christianity. There’s no Bible or secular record of the date of Jesus’ birth. And fat old man in red velour, elves as sweat shop workers, and flying mammals? I think you know where I’m going with this.
4. Speaking of deception, why is it okay to lie to kids on this special “Christian” holiday? Yes, writing letters to your kids from Santa and partially eating the cookies is deceitful. If parents are allowed to lie during the holidays, should kids be exempt from punishment for doing so? I think you see the conflict here.
5. It’s fake and cheesy. Red and green — major fashion faux pas. And the songs, don’t even get me started on how annoying Mariah Carey is…
6. It’s the ultimate conspiration of greed and commercialism. Like most everything promoted by major media, Christmas giving is little more than an opportunity for the rich to get richer and the poor to acquire more crushing debt. It’s the most manipulative time of year.
Psychologist Jeff Gardere, in an appearance Friday on CNN, put some of the blame on retailers for staging sales that encourage hyper-competitive behavior among shoppers who may be desperate because of the poor economy.
“They shouldn’t be psyching them up so much and using all sorts of psychological tactics to get them to feed into this desperation and competitive spirit,” he said. “I think people are whipped into a frenzy, physically, psychologically.”
8. Stress, stress, and more stress. Now that you’ve spent hundreds, if not thousands, of dollars on decorations, gifts, and parties, it’s time to cram every relative you know into one room to embrace the Christmas spirit together. In the words of Dr. Phil, How’s that working for you?
My decision not to celebrate the holidays has been a liberating one for me. The people who love and respect me aren’t bothered by it and I don’t feel left out. I feel relieved! Not celebrating Christmas allows me to be generous when the spirit moves me and eliminates guilt giving, morbid debt, and psychotic shoppers.
How do you really feel about Christmas?